Monday, July 17th, '17
rights reserved © message by Kris Jackson
PAUL AND MARRIAGE
likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife..." (1
Peter 3:7 NKJV)
Chuck Swindoll once used that little play on
words...cute. There isn't room here for Paul's take on Peter, Paul and
Marriage but we can at least examine one line from the lead apostle, Peter.
First he addressed "husbands", that is from the Old English words hus or
"house" and band. He is the house-band, the one that cinches up the belt of
security around the home. The husband fills dual roles as provider and
The second word is "likewise". It refers back
to Peter's discourse on submission, the wife's submission to her husband
(3:1-6) and the believer's submission to the Lord (2:21-25). Submission means
to come "sub" or under the mission. We are "under" Christ, under marching
orders, under covenant, under the banner. For successful marriage husbands must
surrender to Christ's headship.
The third thought is "dwell with them". That
means more than sharing a couch, checkbook or queen-size bed. Two people can
inhabit the same room but be miles apart. A twelve-page newspaper can be an
impenetrable veil when a husband chooses inattention. Katherine Hepburn
quipped, "If you want to sacrifice the attention of many men for the
inattention of one man go ahead and get married". Dwell "with" them. "With"
implies "along side of, in harmony with, together", not above domineering or
demanding. "Dwelling" carries the thought of happy home-life. A dwelling is not
a pit stop or a boarding house. It is life's oasis, the place where we go to
refuel, a safe zone.
Fourth, Peter calls for dwelling "with
understanding". In other words, be considerate. Try to understand. Some things
about the wife he will never understand but at least men can try. The old
version says we are to dwell "according to knowledge". Know your wife. Know
what makes her tick (and tick off). One guy was asked if he knew his wife's
favorite flower, to which he replied, "I think Pillsbury".
Lastly, Peter admonishes, "...giving honor unto
the wife..." That is done by acknowledging her, by considering her wishes, not
ignoring her, and esteeming her as valuable. The best habit in "cohabit" is the
habit of honoring your wife. There is a preachers' wives video out on You-Tube
mimicking Carrie Underwood's mega-hit, maybe next time he'll think before he
cheats. The revised version says maybe next time he'll think before he
speaks. Oh, how many preachers' wives have been made fun of in sermons over
some episode that the Rev thought was amusing! She is your Mrs., not point
three on an outline. At least these wives didn't take a Louisville slugger to
both headlights, slash a knife through all four tires or carve their initials
into his leather seats. We can honor by saying, and to a degree, by not saying.
"Giving" there implies release, a letting go of control for the sake of
edifying the other. That's not asking much but it will definitely reap much.